Do you always have several projects on the go at one time?
Yes, because some will prove fruitless and be abandoned.
Are you a bit of a fidget?
What the hell does that mean? I’ll say no, because I can remain utterly still long enough to disconcert anyone sitting opposite. I don’t nod, I don’t say ‘uh-huh’, I stay motionless and silent and stare at the speaker. Try it. It’s a lot of fun.
Do you suspect that you’re rather superficial?
No, but I suspect most other people of this.
Are you an incorrigible gossip?
Gossip is for old ladies with nothing better to do than lean on a fence and discuss things they know nothing about. I don’t do that.
Can you do two things at once?
Define ‘at once’. I can have several things running simultaneously but I’m only actually doing one at a time. I have only one pair of hands, and this won’t change until medical science advances considerably. This is a difficult one but it’s veering towards no.
Do you start at the back of magazines and work your way to the front?
What kind of idiot does this? Magazines are meant to be read piecemeal, interesting articles first.
Do you need plenty of changes of scene?
Yes. Everyone needs new scenery, otherwise they stagnate in front of the Moron Mesmeriser which increases fat and sucks out intellect.
Do you love meeting new people?
Depends on the people. On the whole, based on past experience, it’s going to be a no.
Do you love making puns and jokes?
I would, if I was better at it. I’ll say yes.
Do you enjoy being spontaneous?
The question presupposes that I am spontaneous. That’s not fair. Other people can decide whether I’m spontaneous or not. I have to say no, because I had to think about the answer and I never enjoy that.
According to this test, I am not a Gemini. You will no doubt be relieved to hear there’s only one of me. As if there was room in the world for another!