10. Capricorn

Are you very careful with your money?

I’m more careful with mine than I would be with yours. The answer, really, is ‘sometimes’. These questions require a yes/no answer so I’ll go with no.

Do your joints get stiff, especially in cold, wet weather?

No, and I think that has more to do with age than birthday myself.

Do people accuse you of being sceptical?

I’ve been accused of this, and I’ve been accused of the opposite. It depends who I’m talking to. Another fifty-fifty question, but I suppose the answer is yes, since I have been accused of this. People don’t like it when their haunting turns out to be a mouse in the wall cavity.

Are you an inveterate worrier?

Double-take time. I thought it said ‘invertebrate’, as in British politician. No, I don’t worry too much, and never for very long. There are better ways to spend time.

Is your cup always half-empty rather than half-full?

Why do people ask this? Why don’t they just say ‘are you a miserable sod who looks on the dark side of everything?’ I’m not. It’s a no.

Are you easily embarrassed by emotional displays?

Not unless they’re directed at me. I am easily annoyed by emotional displays, and move away if possible. I think this is a no.

Do you pride yourself on being logical and practical?

I’m going to say yes even though this question assumes I’m logical before asking if I take pride in it, which is, of course, illogical.

Do you always think you could do better?

Everything can be done better. If that wasn’t true, we might as well stop trying. It’s a yes.

Do you believe we should all take responsibility for ourselves?

Absolutely. I’m fed up of hearing ‘someone else’s fault’ from those who just can’t be bothered to run their own lives.

Were you very serious as a child?

It was some time ago. As I remember, compared to the giggling throng, I was relatively serious. Not all the time, I hasten to add. I wasn’t poring over microscopes and stuck indoors reading books. However, I wasn’t able to switch off my brain and let my inner lunatic take over, as many seemed to do.


As I progress through these tests, there seem to be more and more questions where yes/no does not apply, and more of those that assume a trait before asking if I’m proud of it. It could be just that I’m noticing them more, or that they’re starting to grate.

Anyhow, I didn’t match too well with Capricorn either. Two more to go.