Holes in buckets and heads

I wonder how many remember the old song 'There's a hole in my bucket'?

Essentially it was a long joke set to music. It's a conversation between a husband and wife, which can be distilled to this:

Henry: There's a hole in my bucket.
Lila: Then fix it.
Henry: How?
Lila: With wood.
Henry: The wood is too large
Lila: Then cut it.
Henry: How?
Lila: With an axe.
Henry: The axe is blunt.
Lila: Then sharpen it.
Henry: How?
Lila: With a stone.
Henry: The stone is too dry.
Lila: Then wet it.
Henry: How?
Lila: With water.
Henry. How shall I fetch water?
Lila: With a bucket.
Henry: There's a hole in my bucket...

...and so on. By now it's clear that Henry is a total buffoon, While we're on the subject of total buffoons, here's an example, one of many, of a conversation between the IT department of a university and one of its students. This really happened, about ten years ago.

Student: I can't log on to the network.
IT staff: Of course not. We changed all the passwords while you were on holiday.
Student: So what's my new password?
IT staff: We can't tell you.
Student: So how do I find out?
IT staff: We sent each student their new password by Email.
Student: Well, how can I see that Email?
IT staff. Just log on and you'll see it.
Student: I can't log on to the network.

Some similarity, I think you'll agree, although there's a role reversal here also. The 'Henry' character (the student) is not the buffoon in this case. Yes, this did really happen.

Well, it was ten years ago, and IT has progressed since then. Hasn't it?

My current ISP (damn their eyes) has made 'improvements' which have changed my definition of their system from 'bad' to 'appalling'. They cannot be reached by phone. All I have is a technical department Email address.

If I have problems connecting, I can send an Email to this address and they'll sort it out.

So how do I send Email when I can't log on?

I feel a song coming on...