Monday, February 15, 2010

What a world.

I've decided to start smoking again. The advent of third hand smoke, where non-smokers can be harmed by the mere whiff of tobacco odour on a smoker who has come back inside after being forced out into sub zero temperatures to partake of a legal activity, has convinced me. There are too many feeble idiots in the world now. If there is a God, it's time for another flood. This time, no ark.

There's just no point trying to be nice to these people any more. They aren't worth the effort. I'm going out tomorrow to buy some real cigars and smoke them at home while it's still legal. Moves are already afoot to make it illegal to smoke cigars in my own car or my own home. I will disobey those laws. Enough is enough.

Should I be scared of the authorities? Really? Look at what I have to fear. A police force who refused to enter a river to save a trapped child because health and safety law said they might be at risk of getting a bit cold and wet. I'm supposed to respect and fear weak and worthless people like these? I will not.

I am not a strong swimmer. If I had been there I would have tried. I might have failed and had to be rescued too, I might have suffered the embarrassment of spending time in hospital and I might even have died.

Better that than to live with the memory of watching a child freeze in a river for NINETY MINUTES because a set of rules was more important than a child's life. These people expect to be respected and obeyed. I think they should be shot.

So I will go back to smoking. It might shorten my life, it might not. It is a small act of rebellion against a country that is increasingly full of bubble-wrapped automatons who follow the rules, fear everything that exists and believe every piece of rubbish that is spouted by alleged experts who demonstrably have no idea what they are talking about.

I might not live so long as I would as a non-smoker, but I'll be a lot more relaxed about it.

I don't currently see a downside to that. This is not a world worth persisting with.

13 comments:

heyjude said...

In other words - The fake cigs just don't cut it????

Romulus Crowe said...

Hi Jude

The electric cigars are pretty good. So good, in fact, that the antismokers are now inventing deadly stories about them. One report says they don't even release nicotine, but that same report says they can cause 'third hand smoke'.

They don't produce any smoke! If they don't release nicotine either, then all that comes out is steam. Someone smoking one of these in your house is steam-cleaning your furniture and that's all. You're supposed to be scared of that. No wonder heart attacks rise after smoking bans. It's not the smokers. It's the non-smokers who are now so convinced of imaginary dangers that they have permanent high blood pressure.

I've just had enough. If they are going to get ridiculous about it, I'll smoke real ones too. I'm keeping the battery powered one because it's handy in many situations (the steam dissipates very quickly so doesn't risk getting into photos) but I see no reason to try to compromise with those who will accept no compromise.

They now want to ban smoking in private homes and vehicles. So I'm taking it up again to spite them.

The weather's warming a little. I can get back to the point of this blog soon, I hope. I've had little to say recently.

Regina Richards said...

I say stick with the electric cigs. They're so much more interesting than the real thing. Edgier.

Besides, we like having you around.

heyjude said...

Rom,
listen to Regina!

You shouldn't jeopardize your own health (beyond the unavoidable) to spite someone else. That's just joining the idiots!!! That's letting 'them' win!
Should you cut your leg off or blind yourself etc because construction is often negative for those with handicaps? Idiotic? Right!

Let's each do our part toward a cleaner world and healthier self regardless of the IDIOTS!!!!

And it's grasping at an excuse to give in to the addiction. Beat that instead. We are rooting for YOU!!!

Stick with the electronic ones and laugh with us at the idiots and their stupid stories and rules etc!

Romulus Crowe said...

I dispute the 'addiction' part.

Okay, breathing in smoke is unnatural and contains damaging stuff. Can't deny that part.

However, I switched to the electronic cigar with no problem. I didn't feel the need to go back to the real ones. The electronic one produces no ash and no smoke particles of any kind at all. The steam dissipates in seconds, faster if there's a slight breeze, which is perfect because it doesn't drift into photos. All I was getting - all I thought I was getting - was nicotine and flavoured steam.

Then, it turns out that these things might not actually deliver any nicotine at all. All that's coming out is flavoured steam!

Which means it can't be nicotine addiction. Placebos don't work on real chemical dependency.

It's quite a revelation, you know. Most smokers believe they are as addicted as crack addicts and cannot stop. Turns out it's just a habit and they can stop any time they like.

I tried a real cigar today. Didn't enjoy it. The smoke burns my eyes (the steam doesn't, so you get into the habit of not blowing it away from your face), it's messy because I kept forgetting about the ash building up on the end and I can't stop and start just when I feel like it. I'm restricted by the size of the cigar. It's also dangerous to go back because I can put the electric one back in my pocket without thinking about it.

There was one close call.

So I'll stick to the electric one but just in case any of these control freaks appear, I'll keep the rest of this pack of real ones on hand too.

The electric one is considerably cheaper to run, too. You won't believe what's happened to tobacco prices in just the last few months!

Our government really, really hate smokers.

Regina Richards said...

"It's also dangerous to go back because I can put the electric one back in my pocket without thinking about it."

LOL :)

heyjude said...

heheheheeee !!!!!

Glad to hear the outcome! -

selfishly or not I do like having you stick around! at least outlive me - after all I heaps older!!!

I Do wonder about the addiction thing though. I only smoked for about 10 years - was positive I was not addicted BUT had physical withdrawal when I quit - bad enough to make me STAY quit - about 40 years now.

Romulus Crowe said...

Regina, I didn't LOL. I said something entirely different and not suitable for a blog open to minors.

It wasn't an expensive shirt, fortunately.

Romulus Crowe said...

Heyjude, no worries. If I die first you're on my list of people to haunt.

I'm thinking the physical withdrawal symptoms are psychosomatic, and the tobacco industry (and lately the NRT industry) have a vested interest in keeping the illusion alive.

If they really wanted to save us they'd be promoting the totally safe electric alternative. Instead they are trying to kill it.

That's business. Profit before people.

heyjude said...

"If I die first you're on my list of people to haunt."

OH!!! PROMISE!!!!!! In that case - - - ummm welll, could you just go temporarily so we can discuss it afterward?!?!?!

:-)

ver: shiend

Regina Richards said...

If you die first I don't want to be 'haunted', but feel free to drop by ONCE and say goodbye. Maybe we should have a sign so I know for sure it's you. Maybe you could wave your electric cigar at me?

If I die first, it could be years before I get around to a farewell visit. I have so darm many relatives.

Romulus Crowe said...

Regina - you'd be on the 'benign haunting' list.

There is a second list...

heyjude said...

uh-oh he doesn't say which list I'm on!!! hmmmmmm guess I might be better off going first - as planned.

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