Warning: may contain nuts.

This warning should be on the business cards of most ghost hunting groups.

I visited a ghost hunting group recently, at their invitation. Ostensibly, they wanted to hear what I had to say on the subject. In fact, they wanted me to agree with the way they carried out their 'investigations'.

I didn't.

Can someone tell me why anyone outside a physics laboratory would spend a big wad of cash on a 'tri-field meter'? This is a variation on the EMF meter, but so sensitive it will pick up changes in EMF caused by the blood pumping through your veins.

It's lab equipment. It has a purpose - in a physics lab. In the hands of paranormal investigators, it's a total waste of time and money.

Here's another thing to carve in stone and nail to the heads of any ghosthunter you meet: 'More sensitive' does not necessarily equate to 'better'.

When you are looking for paranormal activity with an EMF meter, you want to see big changes in the readings. Tiny fluctuations are of no relevance whatsoever. Having a meter so sensitive it can detect your pocket change moving around is just plain stupid. You'll never spot any paranormal activity with all that distracting background noise.

Big changes in EMF might mean something. There is no sense at all in playing around with the tiny changes. Expensive EMF meters are a waste of money. They results you get with cheaper, less sensitive devices are far more meaningful.

I told them this. They weren't pleased. Harsh words were exchanged. I went to the pub next door.

These people are not paranormal investigators. They are gadget collectors. They measure their status by the price tags on their pointless equipment.

And yes, they did proudly display orb photos. I assumed they were there for me to laugh at.

Apparently, they weren't.